The One With All the Manipulation

My job is so weird. It really makes me miss being a reporter. My supervisor and the GM are now playing so many games with each other -- and Sophie and I in the process -- that I can barely keep it straight. The GM is lying to protect some Director, but we all know that he's lying. He's trying to keep staff from meetings to make himself look good. Most importantly to me, he's telling me things that are in direct conflict with what Joanna tells me to do. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place. He's trying to play me against her so much that I actually feel sorry for her. And we all know how I feel about her.

But her being angry at him means that I get to come in at 8, leave at 5 and take a lunch, which is all I wanted in the first place! Does anyone else put up with this kind of stuff at their jobs?

The good news is that dog training is going pretty well. I just got a new client who might sign up for a package of seven lessons and my boss has an evaluation in my area that she's going to pass to me if the dog proves to not have any aggression. We're also getting ready to start another round of group classes, and it seems like the store we work at is making a concentrated effort to sell more of the class spots. My Redondo Beach store already has four on the roster and says they're trying to sell it out. If that happens, I can push for a second class there. So at least one of my jobs is going well -- and one of my bosses is actually normal. Plus, she's letting me stay at her house and run the business while she's out of town for 10 days in October, which is a pretty big compliment considering that she has three other girls working for her. But I get to answer the phones and take any clients that I can handle during that time. She wants me to have good phone skills because it's such an important part of running your own business.

Guess that's it for now. No attacks, but Muggsy was very nervous on our walk tonight, so I'm giving him the night off from training. I think I'm just going to read tonight. Tomorrow, I'm borrowing a video camera to record some of my sessions for the behaviorist. I still think there's something wrong with diagnosing a dog from a tape, but ya do what ya gotta do.

The One With All the Training

Since I had the weekend off from dog training, I decided to do more dog training. I had a fleeting vision of reading at the beach, but I put myself in check and stayed home to get stuff done instead.

Yesterday, Muggsy had a long day of training. I took him to one of my boss' dog classes and had him sitting on the deck at the Starbucks with all the other dogs and people. He let my boss and another trainer pet him, but I wouldn't let anyone else come near him. However, he was in some close situations with people going by and he handled them all very well. We walked around a parking lot and practiced some commands. My boss said he's a perfect demo dog because he does everything perfectly, except the things that scare him. I guess that's something. We also went to the pet store and got a caricature done. It wasn't very good, but it was fun. Then, we went to lunch and he sat on the deck with me again. It was pretty stressful, but the more experiences like this he has that are positive, the better he will get. But he's still stressed the whole time. My boss said she didn't see any changes because of the medication either. I have my followup appointment in two weeks.

The Santa Anas have hit here, the only two weeks where it's hot near the beach. It's been in the 80s the last two days and everyone is complaining. I honestly don't think that people from Southern California can survive anywhere else. If it's colder than 60 and hotter than 70, the complaining never stops. I enjoy it because even when it gets hot, it's not as hot as Dallas, and even when it gets cold, it's not as cold as Kansas. :)

Today, I've done an indoor session with the dogs, short sessions for all three. I taught Muggsy and Fenway targeting, and Chubbs is really getting shake. I also worked on down-stays and, for Muggsy, getting off the bed on command. Later this evening, I'm going to do an outdoor session where we practice come, directionals and wait, which I discovered this week that Chubbs remembers from class. I took all three of them for a walk by myself Friday, which isn't easy. At the curb, I don't want them running out in the street. Since Chubbs was in the lead, when they would get the curb, I would call out Chubbs, wait! and he would stop until I said OK. Sometimes he amazes me at how smart he is.

Other times, like today, he goes after a bone that Muggsy has, and I can't figure out what keeps his head from collapsing inward. :)

On a non-training note, Ross and I bought a crock pot a couple weeks ago, and it's so great. We bought a cookbook with tons of recipes in it, and it's practically all we use. Just throw stuff in a pot in the morning and it's cooked when you get home from work. Balanced meals, too. It's great. Ross has a fantasy draft tonight, so we made chili this morning that we can have for dinner. Very little effort required, but I had to stop helping because onions make my eyes burn so badly that I can't keep them open. Who knew? Guess that's why I never cook with onions. It's been four hours, and my eyes still hurt.

OK, that's it. I had to get my computer stuff done before Ross' draft. Have a good rest of the weekend.

The One With Another Attack

Tonight, Muggsy attacked Chubbs. He was lying on the bed in between me and Robby and Muggsy jumped on the bed. He was on the bed about 15 seconds before he started biting Chubbs around the neck. No bloodshed, but I was scared. I was trapped at the back of the bed, so I screamed at the top of my lungs. It stopped, but Chubbs had peed all over the bed. I told Muggsy to leave the room and he went to his crate, where he still is.

This is five days since his last blowup, which was last Saturday when he growled at Robby. It's an improvement from two days, but not inconsistent with Muggsy's pattern.

The One With the Phone Call

I called Dr. Boss today about Dr. BS. She didn't defend her and she said that I could do my follow-up with her, but she didn't say I could have extra time or any money refunded. But like my boss said, you can't really expect much more than I got. She clearly isn't going to badmouth her employee on the phone. My boss said that if she heard something like that about me, she would politely address the person on the phone and then probably fire me. So she thinks that even though Dr. Boss didn't say so, Dr. BS might very well be in trouble. Maybe I made a difference, maybe not.

Dr. Boss was also very tough to deal with. She didn't even want to apologize that I was having a bad experience with her company. You'd think that she'd at least feel bad. She wants me to video tape my sessions with Muggsy and just general times throughout the day so she can watch them at the next session.

What really bothers me as a dog trainer is that she's charging so much but never laying her hands on my dog. You know, when my boss trains an aggressive dog, she's in the house, observing the behavior, handling the dog. These people are relying on a videotape to get the picture, and it just doesn't cut it. There are so many subtle changes to a dog during stress that you won't be able to see on a TV screen. Just like watching the movie is never a substitute for reading the book, watching a tape is never a substitute for handling a dog. I find it very frustrating. If Muggsy didn't need to be on medication, I would never have done this, and I would never recommend it to someone else with an aggressive dog. Unless you need medication, you're not going to get the help you need.

Speaking of training, there have been no blowups today, but I didn't really feel like training. I'm really tired, and I elected to take them for a walk to get them some exercise instead of training. I have to work tomorrow evening, but I'll work with them plenty this weekend.

The One With No Attacks

Muggsy's Training Log
Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Yesterday was a good day. When I got home from work, Muggsy came from the kitchen where Ross was cooking to greet me. As he was heading back to the kitchen, Chubbs came tearing around the corner and ran right into Muggsy. With this being such an emotional time, greeting me and all, I expected an attack. Nope. Muggsy backed up, looked at me and waited for Chubbs to pass. Chubbs, realizing how close he came, darted into his crate and out of the way. I'm very, very proud of both my boys!

I was sick Monday so I haven't done much training, but last night, I continued to work on come, right and down with Muggsy. Come is going pretty well. He will come out of going after someone, if he knows I have treats. That means it's about time to start weaning him off treats. He's also doing right pretty well, but I don't know if he could do that without the treat either. I'll start experimenting with less treats after this week probably. Chubbs and Fenway both worked on down-stays and Fenway worked on up. That's going pretty well, especially since I worked with all of them together yesterday instead of separately.

Anyway, that's about it. Back to work.

The One With the Reminder

I got this as a forward today, and I thought it's something that we all need a reminder of. I saw some that especially hit home for me. So I wanted to let you guys see the list of 25 Things a Sista Should Never Apologize For...


OK, so we're not really sistas, but you get the drift. :)

1. Never apologize for pursuing what makes you happy. Even if you need to quit your job, transfer schools, or move across country, always do what you really want.

2. Never apologize for using proper English. Keeping it real doesn't mean speaking Ebonics.

3. Never apologize for giving your best in a relationship that just didn't work out.

4. Never apologize for being successful. Only haters want to keep you at their level.

5. Never apologize for crying. Wear waterproof mascara and express yourself.

6. Never apologize for ten pounds you need to lose. People who truly care about you will accept you as you are.

7. Never apologize for being frugal. Just because you save your money instead of blowing it on the latest fashion emergency doesn't mean you're cheap.

8.Don't apologize for being a single Mom. Babies are a blessing.

9. Never apologize for treating yourself to something special. Sometimes you have to show yourself some appreciation.

10. Never apologize for leaving an abusive relationship. Your safety should always be a priority.

11. Never apologize for keeping the ring even if you did not get married.

12. Never apologize for setting high standards in a relationship. You know what you can tolerate and what simply gets on your nerves.

13. Never apologize for saying NO.

14. Never apologize for asking for what you want in bed. If you don't, then who will?

15. Never apologize for wearing a weave or braids. You bought it so it's yours.

16. Never apologize to your new friends about old friends. There's a reason she's been your girl from day one.

17. Never apologize for ordering dessert or more than one dessert.

18. Never apologize for dating outside your race. Just because you found Mr. Right across the color line doesn't mean you don't love your brothas.

19. Never apologize for demanding respect. You are to always be treated as a queen.

20. Never apologize for not knowing how to cook. Even if you can't burn like Grandma you know how to order good take out. (Right Girl!)

21. Never apologize for your taste in clothes. It's your style.

22. Never apologize for changing your mind, it is your prerogative.

23. Never apologize for making a decision from your heart, even if others don't agree. You have to live with the consequences not them.

24. Never apologize for making more money than your man, you work hard and you deserve to get paid.

25. Never apologize for being you!

Have a great day, sistas.

The One With the Letter

I'm sending this to Dr. Boneysocks' boss. Can you guys read it and give me any feedback if you think it's too harsh or should be condensed or something. I'm going to call her as well, but I wanted to have my complaints in writing. She's telling me that my treatment is done, even though she's done nothing to help me, and it will cost more money from here on out. I've already spent $1,000 on this. Anyway, here's the letter with all name references changed for privacy.




Dear Dr. Boss:

In July, I scheduled an appointment with you because of a referral I received from someone in my dog training circle. Because I live in Los Angeles, I was scheduled with Dr. Boneysocks on the one day a month that someone from your office visits AVCC. I brought you my Akita mix, Muggsy, who I have been working with for several months on desensitization and classical conditioning, because the poor guy is constantly stressed. I cannot seem to work with him below-threshold because he is stressed out by every noise he hears and every situation he finds himself in. I was worried that he was hypothyroid and wanted a blood test. I also wanted to discuss the possibility of anti-anxiety medication in the event that we have done all we can do from a training standpoint. I spent several months desensitizing Muggsy to a muzzle and teaching him a go-behind-a-door exercise that would allow us to draw blood in preparation for this visit. I attended with my boss, who has 14 years of experience in training dogs, specializing in aggression issues.

From the beginning, it was clear that Dr. Boneysocks did not have the experience necessary to properly treat my dog. Her only new training suggestion for me was to teach him targeting, and she was very hesitant in handling him behind the door. Since Muggsy is very gun-shy with medical professionals, especially those who are nervous around him, blood could not be drawn. She was very timid with him, making it clear to me that she had very little experience in dealing with aggressive dogs. In addition, she showed me the wrong way to hold his leg for the blood draw as I was later corrected by a vet tech at another veterinary facility, where, I might add, the blood draw went very smoothly. Though I had stated that the decision to medicate Muggsy was a hard one for me because I would prefer to train him and though I mentioned that Muggsy had not been to a vet in two years because of his nervousness toward veterinarians, she still suggested if necessary, we could put Muggsy on medication without a blood test. I find this appalling. Everyone who has heard this story finds this appalling. I returned with Muggsy to get a blood draw with vet techs who had confidence in handling him, which ended up costing me an extra $300 more than the initial $450 appointment in lab costs and tech handling fees.

After the blood draw, Dr. Boneysocks was attending a conference and did not return several e-mails or phone calls. It took a week and a half to get the results of the blood test, and I got them from AVCC. Two phone calls after receiving the blood test, Dr. Boneysocks finally returned my calls to discuss these with me. This was almost a month where I was receiving no treatment from Dr. Boneysocks.

The results of the blood test came back with Muggsy’s thyroid level labeled “gray area.” According to several studies I have read by experts, his level would require thyroid treatment. Dr. Boneysocks told me that she refused to treat him for thyroid but would not answer any of my questions why. When pressed, she responded, “You have to trust my medical expertise. If you don’t, you can go see someone else.” I find this completely unacceptable. I have had medical problems throughout the years and always question my doctors on my treatment. Not one of them has ever made me feel like Dr. Boneysocks . It took more than a month for her to tell me why she didn’t agree with Dr. Expert's thyroid testing practices. If she felt strongly about this, she should have helped educate me on the best medical care for my dog. That’s what I was paying her to do. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t research their diagnosis by a medical professional and question it. Any reputable doctor will have no problem answering those questions and certainly won’t tell someone to just get another veterinarian if they question their diagnosis with legitimate questions. She made catty comments at both me and my boss, further making me feel small and troublesome. I was so displeased with her treatment that I sought a second opinion, which cost me another $150 in blood tests. For the record, I got excellent treatment and received the results with a call from the doctor herself, not the vet tech, the very next day.

Because of the money I have spent with your company, however, I have elected to continue my treatment with you. She has written me a prescription for Paxil, which, because of her time at the conference and time in getting a second opinion due to her incompetence, I have just introduced into Muggsy’s system. A week into it, there is no change in Muggsy’s behavior at all, which I know is completely normal.

However, she has informed me that my last chance for a follow-up without additional charges is September. She has informed me that you or Dr. Other Doctor will be doing that follow-up, not her. It’s clear that she no longer wants to deal with me. After all I have dealt with, I can’t believe she is being so inflexible with my follow-up appointment. There won’t be anything to talk about in early September, and it would be much more beneficial to have a follow-up appointment once the medication has made changes in Muggsy’s behavior. In addition, I will have to pay $75 to have e-mail correspondence with her after this? When it is her job to treat Muggsy and she has done nothing so far to contribute to his getting better? I need someone to help me adjust dosage if necessary or change medication if this doesn’t prove to be the right match. She has suggested that I just pass this task along to my local veterinarian, but I went to a specialist because I wanted the additional expertise. She has done nothing to earn her $450, and I’m certainly not comfortable passing this along to a regular veterinarian when I haven’t received any care from her.

Half of my three months have been wasted waiting for her to return phone calls and work with me on medication. I can’t justify paying even more when I haven’t received my money’s worth from the initial appointment. At the very least, I would like to request working with you for my follow-up and any future communication because I would like a doctor with enough expertise to properly access my dog. I deserve that, at the very least. She clearly doesn’t have the experience to work with a difficult dog like Muggsy, and instead of treating me with the respect that I deserve and telling me that she is not the right person to work with me, she handled it by putting me off and insulting me with catty and condescending comments. My dog deserves the best care that money can buy. I certainly haven’t gotten it here.

By the time you read this, we will have already discussed this, but I wanted you to have my complaints in writing. My dog’s care is very important to me, and I should feel that it’s important to you as well.


Thank you,



Rachel Green and her dog, Muggsy

The One With the Training Log

My boss has suggested that I start a training log to record all of Muggsy's blowups. I am supposed to see a trend where they get farther apart or quit giving him the medicene because it isn't doing any good.

I am sad to report that so far, not so good. Muggsy attacked Chubbs Thursday and then yesterday, he growled at Ross when asked to get off the bed. To be fair, we had been sleeping there together for more than an hour, so we were both pretty comfortable. I think he was just expressing his displeasure because after growling, he immediately jumped off the bed. However, it's still a blowup, three days from the last one. That's not very good.

So this week, my training goals for Muggsy are to practice getting off the bed, doing down-stays in his spot, practicing come, right and heel, and starting to learn targeting and left. I just plan to do a couple of quick sessions each day and record how each training session goes. I'm also going to reward him for the appropriate responses to Chubbs and outdoor responses. Probably next week, I'm going to start training him how to act when people walk by the house. I just want to get his commands pretty strong first.

My training goals for Chubbs are to work on down-stays on his spot and shake. I'm also going to teach him to heel. I'm going to work with Fenway on down-stays, come and teaching her to walk after the up command.

So that's what I have going this week. Tonight is my last graduation class and I get two weeks off before the next round starts. I do have one private lesson next week and I have to work some nights and weekends with my other job, but I'll have a little free time. That will be a good amount of time to work with the dogs.

The One Where It's OK to Be an A-Hole in Boston

Last night, Ross and I went to the Red Sox-Angels game. One of his colleagues has season tickets and her parents couldn't go, so he got the tickets for free. Being a big Red Sox fan, he was pretty excited. We got to see a good game. Boston was up 3-1 until the bottom of the eighth when the Angels tied it. We got to see Schilling and Boston won in the 10th.

But this blew my mind. When we were leaving, of course, the parking lot was terrible. I was trying to merge from my row. It was my turn. This guy in a van came riding right up on the car in front of him and wouldn't let me in. So we roll down our windows and are like, "Why won't you let us in? We're all in the same place." With his kid in the car, he rolls down his window, flips me off and says, "I'm from Boston, OK?" So apparently, it's OK to be an asshole if you're from Boston. I didn't know. I've never been there. I didn't think, "I'm from the Midwest and learned how to treat people with respect" was a suitable come back, nor is "Well, this is L.A. and the next person you say that to might pull out a gun and shoot you," so I just kept my mouth shut. People never cease to amaze me. What did he gain by not letting me in? Three seconds. Guess that makes all the difference.


****


Guess what!! There is going to be a characturist at my Long Beach store one Saturday in September. I am so taking my dogs to that!! How funny will that be? I'll frame them and hang them up in my living room because we all know I don't have enough pictures to my dogs in my shrine, uh, house. :)

As far as training, I haven't done much. I'm exhausted, unfortunately, with two jobs and a full-time Muggsy, so I haven't had a lot of extra time. I did play the "Come Game" with all the dogs today and Muggsy stayed focused on me while the pizza guy went next door (have I mentioned that my neighbors get pizza for EVERY meal??? and the husband is a cook for a living!!). I had treats, but I was still really proud that he paid attention.

I taught Fenway "up." She just gets up on her hind legs. I'm going to teach her to walk after awhile. I really want a dog to do freestyle with. I was going to do it with Chubbs, but maybe it would be good for Fenway to have something that's hers. I'll teach her a little routine to music and it will be fun for her. I think she could learn well if I put more time into her, but so could Chubbs. I'm just stretched a little thin right now.

The One with the Little Man

I've been pretty AWOL this week myself. I'm all caught up in this book I picked up at the LAX airport. It's about a girl who's dad is in the Canadian air force during the cold war. So it's a bit of historical fiction, and mostly about the girl and her family, and it's also a murder mystery. I can't put it down.

Maggie and Theo survived the chicken incident just fine. For those of you who don't know, my dogs ate an entire rotissory chicken, bones and all. There were little to no side affects. Silly dog. Also on the dog front, Theo has gone through a humping phase and pleasures himself on all blankets, pillows, clothing left on the floor. This grosses me out. Chandler thinks its hilarious. Hello!? Didn't you come neutered? What the heck?

David is doing great. He's going to bed by himself. He's moving up the three-year-old (Preschool I) classroom next Monday. As you can see, I got him a mini backpack for the big transition. Cute! He's excited for his birthday and tells everyone he wants strawberries. So I think I'm going to make a strawberry shortcake for the party. I'm going to try to make him a Jayhawks quilt also. They have some Jayhawk fabric at a store in Lawrence. And I think we're getting him a bike. Dick's has a little mini one with training wheels. He's getting pretty good on the trike, so maybe it's time to move up! I think my mom is getting him a little basketball goal, and he's going to play soccer in September on a little YMCA team. So he's on track to become an All-American athlete! :) He's also doing very well with his colors, which were giving him problems. And he has added "Mama, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys" and "London Bridges" to his expansive repetiore. There's your David fix!

Have a great weekend all!

PS Just saw the one where Ross's leather pants get stuck around his ankles ... "the lotion and powder have formed a paste!"

The One With Everything From Tom Petty to Training

I have been so busy at work, all! I'm finally starting to feel the effects of Mark leaving, and it couldn't come at a weirder time. Joanna has been hit by a nice stick. Well, listen to what happened. I have been keeping some of you posted on our Request for Proposal for our Publications Consultant. We have some unethical Board members that were trying to get the firm that runs their political campaigns to win the contract. They aren't qualified for the work that it involves, but they're pushing for this firm because I'm sure they're getting kickbacks. However, the Director that usually breaks the tie between the unethical duo and the old ethical guys actually voted with the ethical guys, which never happens. We won!! The firm we wanted got it.

I, of course, was torn because I want to see Joanna quit, which she might do over this, but my job will get a lot harder if I have to work with this unqualified firm.

This week, the unethical duo won. The third Director reconsidered his position and has requested the item come back to the Board next month. Joanna went to her boss, the co-GM, and from some of the things he said and did, we think he's in bed with the enemy instead of looking after us. She had the same reaction to this as I did when I found out that she was playing Mark and I off each other. She has decided to come at 8, leave at 5 and take lunch and has told us we can do the same. Wow!! We can follow the law!! Gee, thanks. She even said it's OK that our families come first. Whoa. Um, mine always did. But she's being really easy on us and has even started pushing for us to get to go to this conference in Vegas -- three days: all meals, hotel room and mileage paid for. So a free trip to Vegas for Robby and I!! Crazy. So my work is harder but my boss is easier. Go figure.


*****


Sunday, Ross and I went to the Tom Petty concert at the Verizon Amphitheater. It was incredible, of course. They way oversold the lawn, so it was really crowded, and we couldn't see, but the music is the most important part. I love Tom. He got me over my breakup with Barry. I think I listened to Wild Flowers every day for several months. My junior year roommate thinks that it was the only thing I ever listened to that year. He didn't play as many obscure songs as he did two years ago when I went in Dallas, but he played all my favorites, "Mary Jane's Last Dance," "Learning to Fly" and "American Girl."

He ended with "American Girl." I love the first verse of that song. Tell me this isn't so fitting for me? "Well, she was an American Girl, raised on promises. She couldn't help thinkin' that there was a little more to life somewhere else. After all, it was a great big world with lots of places to run to. And if she had to die tryin' she had one little promise she was gonna keep." My promise, of course, was to move to Dallas and work for the Morning News. I made that promise to myself when I was 12 and kept it. But that verse makes me think of being 17.

Anyway, I love Tom. Not a lot of talking, but he always says "Thank you very much, baby dolls." He played a Traveling Wilburys song and he has a new song called, "Melinda." But it's about a hooker. Not much more to say. It was a good time.



*****


Muggsy's Training Diary
August 18, 2005

Muggsy is in Day 6 of his medicene with no negative side effects. There have been no changes, but I guess it could take up to a month to see any real changes. I have noticed some training changes. In general, he's less reactive and for a shorter time. I had a real revelation with him yesterday morning. He just does not like his "job" of guarding the house. He was having a bad day -- very reactive. On our walk, he couldn't even look at me. In the morning, the door was closed to the bedroom, and Chubbs was in there with me with Muggsy in the living room. He was nutty, barking at everything, so I brought him back in with me and let Chubbs have the living room. You could just see him physically relax. He was so much calmer. He really needs me to take control and say, "You don't need to do this." I think that keeping him in the bedroom while I'm gone has done as much for his personality as anything because when I'm not there, he still doesn't have to guard. It keeps him from spending the whole day freaking out, which is making a difference.

I let Muggsy and Chubbs in the same room intermittenly yesterday and for most of the evening today. When Ross got home, I let them greet him at the door, which was my mistake. Too much too fast. Muggsy attacked. I stormed out. It stopped and he was waiting guiltily in his crate when I got back. He didn't come out until I said OK and I made him do some obedience cues before I would acknowledge him. The attack wasn't bad, which proves that the medicene has not increased the aggression. Honestly, it hasn't changed him at all.

As far as obedience goes, I am teaching him come, which has kind of slipped through the cracks with him. But I want his recall to be as rock solid as Chubbs' is. I'm also teaching him heel so he can walk along side me, focused on me, when there is something around him that will make him react. I'm also teaching him 'left' and 'right,' which I read in a book and love the idea. I'm going to use it to direct him away from things if he's loose in the yard and the water guy comes in or something. Then I can command him into a direction and he'll go away from it. Come will also work for that. I just want him to have lots of options. I also do sit, stay, stand and look. And of course, shake. I bought a trick book and will teach him more stuff later. I don't know if I told you all this, but I'm going to teach him to touch a hand mirror when I say "Who's the cutest dog in the world?" and touch me when I say, "Who do you love the most?" :) His down is getting better, but I've been working him in the yard and haven't practiced stay there yet because it's pretty distracting. During training tonight, I called him off a couple of distractions -- kid walking by and dog walking by -- to come back and focus on me so that was good. He's trying. I think there is still hope.

I've been exhausted this week so I haven't been reading and training as much as I should, but I'm back at it finally!! And I don't have classes for the next two weeks after Sunday, even though I have to work both weekends for my other job, so I should have more time for my own dogs. I'm going to keep a more careful log so you can all see what's going on, so I should have a training post every day.

The One With the Medical Update

Though I have talked to everyone who reads this blog, I just wanted to let you all know that Muggsy is fine. His T4 thyroid is low and his Free T3 is low-ish, but not so low that Dr. Dodds believes that it warrants treatment. It should not be affecting his behavior. However, his tryglicerides are twice what they should be, which means that he will probably develop either hypothyroidism or diabetes as he gets older. I will have to have his blood tested yearly.

But that doesn't matter now that he is such a rock star stud. Before we got to the clinic, I told Muggsy, you know, we're never going to compete in agility or obedience. These things just aren't in the stars for you. Getting blood like this is our championship. Let's just see how well we perform.

I hate to brag, but he did so well that the vet tech thought I had lied to her about how Muggsy behaved at the vet. He sat behind the door and we drew enough blood to run every test we could ever need to run. There was probably even some left over. My boss said she even looked behind the door at one point to see if he was still there. She and I both almost cried from our success. So it's OK that we went through all that trouble for nothing. Muggsy won the blood draw championship. And because he deserved the championship treatment, I took him out for a steak after it was over. That's right, he had a steak from a restaurant in Rancho Palos Verdes where I was going for a private lesson. He was a rock star. My boss even said that she really needed to see something like that to be reminded that hard work does pay off. I think everyone who knows Muggsy out here has been touched by him in some way, even stupid Dr. Boneysocks who will hopefully become a better doctor after having to deal with someone who makes her explain her diagnoses.

This girl who I have met at a couple conferences who knows my boss called me the day of the blood draw to tell me that "everyone really admires you for what you're doing. We're really pulling for you." She told me that "we all" admire all the work I'd put in and the dedication I had to my dog. I found this so funny because I don't know who we all is. I don't know any of these people. So I have this fan club talking about me who I've never met. I like to picture them with T-shirts that have Muggsy's big smiling face on them, one ear up and one ear down. Afterward, my boss said, "I was telling everyone about what happened and no one could believe it. They were so proud of you." I resisted the urge to cry out, "Who's they???? Who are these people who know so much about me?" But I'm sure they're all her friends, and it makes me feel good that she's proud enough to talk about me. It's nice to have a cheering section, even when you don't really know it.

The treatment suggestions for Muggsy were to take him off his heartworm medication, which is putting a lot of chemicals in his body and stop giving him vaccinations until his titers show that he needs them. This makes me really, really nervous because those treatments are there for a reason -- to protect your dog. But the risks out here aren't as bad as they are in the South and Midwest, and everyone assures me that it should be fine. I'm still thinking about it. I also have to take Muggsy completely off red meat and put him on a fish-based diet. I plan to give him allergy supplements to see if it clears up his skin problems. If not, I will be taking him back to Dr. Dodds for further treatment.

I have put him on Paxil. We're on Day 2. If by tomorrow or Monday, I don't see an increase in his aggression or serious vomiting and diaherria, it should be fine to continue use. In a month, I should see him start to calm down and other better behaviors when afraid. I will continue to work on his obedience and start desensitization and classical conditioning while on walks and especially with Chubbs. The abandonment training seems to be working well though with the Chubbs problem. I have done it twice and Muggsy has not attacked though given opportunities in the last two days. Through experimentation, we have found that I'm the trigger. They only fight over me. So if I remove myself in disgust when the display starts, it should work to stop it. We'll see. According to my boss, if it's going to work, I'll only need to use it like six times.

Alright, I think I'm finally caught up with my blogging. Whew. Time to go read.

The One Where Cars Are Indicative of Culture

All of my observations of Southern California in my first year on the coast can be summed up by using driving examples. When I moved out here, everyone said that Southern Californians had their own time tables, were very laidback and are very shallow.

Well, of course they have their own timetables. The average person in Los Angeles spends more than 12 hours a week commuting to and from work. And that includes the people like me who have 15 minutes commutes. And those commutes aren't spent driving. Nope, sitting in our cars. I live 8 miles from work and it takes me 15-20 minutes to get there. We have to have our own timetables or we'd be leaving two hours earlier than we need to be anywhere.

And everyone is very laidback, though they are on their own timetables. In the rush to beat the traffic, three people make it through the light after it turns red. I don't even slow down at yellow lights anymore. But no one honks. People may cut you off since they're already an hour late for work after their two-hour commute, but you get rare honks. In the Midwest, if you go somewhere like Chicago, people are constantly honking at each other. I can't have a 10-minute conversation with Mindy without hearing her honk at three people. When I lived in Dallas, I would lay on the horn if someone didn't start moving when the light turns green. Here, no one honks because everyone waits when the light turns green. After all, three more cars still have to get through the light going the other way. It's funny.

The shallow thing is also apparent in the way people treat their cars. It's all about looks out here. I have a friend out here who's from Iowa, and he and I have both noticed how often people wash their cars. If you have a dirty car, you're ostrasized. Believe me, I have a dirty car!! Everyone I work with washes their car at least once a week. I'm a once a year kind of girl, once a month now that I have a white car. If the inside of your car is dirty, no one will ride with you at lunch. They don't put stickers on their cars because they think it makes them uncool. I had one girl tell me, "It's so not L.A." Look around and you'll notice, very few people have dirty cars. It's unbelieveable. These people could not live in the country!!

So I guess all of the L.A. stereotypes are true to some degree. Just take a ride in traffic one afternoon, and you can tell all you need to know.

The One with the Sleeping Breakthrough

I don't know if you all know the sleep habits David has adapted, but they consist of desperately needing his daddy to sit with him, right next to his bed on the hard floor, until David falls asleep. Then when Chandler gets up and the floor creaks, David wakes up and we're right back where we started. I decided that this was ridiculous and that my almost 3-year-old was certainly big enough to fall asleep by himself.

So, on Tuesday night, I removed Chandler completely from the picture. I sat with David and read a story, sang songs to him while he drank his milk, and then sat with him while he fell asleep. It was a start, at least he wasn't constantly asking for his daddy. Then when he was pretty much asleep I left the room. This became the start of a severe screaming fit. I'm surprised the neighbors didn't call the police. It sounded like we were torturing him.

I finally went in and said "Stop screaming. Do not scream again or I will give you a spanking." I said it harshly enough that I had his attention. Then I talked to him about being a big boy, how he can go potty all by himself and get himself dressed, and how proud I am of him. Then I gave him Mickey Mouse (a gift from Rach) and told him to squeeze Mickey everytime he was sad or scared or wanted to scream. And I told him to say "I can do it Mama." IT WORKED! It was pretty pathetic, the way he squeaked out "I can do it." But he fell asleep by himself!

So the next day we made a big deal about it and told him how proud we were and told his teachers. He was so proud of himself that last night he was all prepared and didn't even whimper when I left the room! He just kept yelling "I can do it Mom!" with Mickey. But it got quieter and quieter until he was asleep!!! He went to sleep by himself. From now on Chandler does not get to put David to bed. He's the weak one. He gives in to the "sit with me Dad" in the sad little voice. No more. I'm not breaking him of this again!

The One With the Bad Mother

And the award for world's worst mother goes to...yes, that's right, me.

OK, probably not. After all, my dogs are more well cared for than some people's children. But I've had yet another run of bad luck.

Yesterday, I found out that the new vet clinic I went to didn't draw enough blood. That means, of course, that I have to do it again. This is the fourth time, in case anyone is counting, and I'm getting pretty pissed. Does having a Ph.D. mean nothing? Just draw the blood out of my dog's leg. This is so hard on him and I'm just devastated about taking him back. He handled it so well last time. Yes, he was terrified, but his bounce back was incredible. He went from four days to four minutes, and you could just tell that he trusted I was making the right decisions. This is huge progress for our relationship. Now, I feel like I'm betraying him by making him do it again when it isn't his fault that the vet was incompetant. And he doesn't even know. I'm sure he'll trust me again after this, too.

Plus, guys, this is getting expensive. It's like $250 a pop to do this, not to mention the $450 I spent on the vet who refused to treat him. I'm in the process of trying to get some of my money back, but I have to do it again -- with a different doctor -- Wednesday. This time, I'm going straight to the doctor who wrote the book on thyroid. Fortunately, she, like 16 million others, is living right here in Southern California. And she answers her own phones. Gotta love that.

Now onto the next story of my bad mother-ness... Every morning, I get up early to take Muggsy for a walk. I do this because he's back in the bedroom all day, getting less exercise than he used to when he had access to other dogs to play with and the back yard. As I was bringing him in today, he attacked Chubbs. I, of course, did my abandonment training, but unfortunately, Chubbs followed me. He ran down the sidewalk, but his recall is rock solid, so he came back and I got him in the car. When I got back home, he refused to leave the car. Just refused. He was too scared to go back in the house. I had to drag him from the car and put Muggsy in his crate so that Chubbs would feel safe running through the living room, straight into his crate. Boy, did that make me feel terrible. I spend all this time working with my first son and my second is too afraid to come in the house. What a terrible atmosphere to live in. And they don't have a choice. I picked them and brought them into my life, and they have to live with the consequences. Terrible. Awful, awful, awful. I was all excited because they played together last night and it seemed like Chubbs was getting less afraid to be around Muggsy. Poor guy.

Thanks, everyone, for your consolation and support yesterday. But my other best friend, Mindy, has to get the award for saying just the right thing at just the right time, "You know it will be fine. But it sucks right now." Leave it to her to know exactly what it is that I need to hear. But I do appreciate all the you'll be fines and he'll still love yous and you're doing a great jobs that I got yesterday. It's nice to know that so many people care about you. Even Joanna was understanding and told me that when you love another life that much and try to do your best by it, everything will work out. I could see her eyes light up when I said, "I just want someone to be accountable and admit they made a mistake instead of pointing fingers." It was like I was speaking her language -- the language of work. It was very nice of her to let me leave work yesterday when I was devastated and take Wednesday off for the blood draw.

So, yes, with all this support, I know everything will work out. It just sucks right now.

The One With the Epiphany

I haven't posted in awhile, so I do have a few things to say. I'll try to keep it brief, but I do have quite a bit of Grandma in me, so we'll see.

• I had an epiphany a couple of weeks ago that has made work much better for me -- I don't care! What it boils down to is that I really like who I am. I am a good person who cares about the things that are important -- my family and friends. So what if that means my dogs? So what if I'm interested in sports instead of shopping? I like who I am. I like that I'm not shallow and that I don't give everything I have to my job. So I've decided not to let all the people who usually get me down hurt me anymore. It's only hurting me that I care so much what other people think. I like me. That's it.
• I found out that the job I interviewed for has postponed its hiring for awhile. I found this out because a woman who used to work with me and left because of my boss and her boss knew the guy who is hiring really well and called to recommend me. He told her that because he was impressed with me and was grateful for her recommendation that I would get a third interview when the time comes. I found that out last week. Sorry I haven't mentioned it, if I haven't (can't remember), but I've been preoccupied with Muggsy.
• Muggsy got his blood draw Friday night for the thyroid panel redo. He did very well, considering that he freaked out and peed and pooed on himself. But he bounced back incredibly and my boss told me that a dog who needed to be euthanized would hold a grudge against me while he wags his tail at me after it's over. She said that indicates that he understands I'm just trying to help him and that he trusts me. He wasn't mean when he got home and never had a meltdown like last time!! I know it's a small victory, but that means that he's capable of improvement. I'm proud. I should get the results of the blood panel in a week or so.
• In training news, I allowed Muggsy and Chubbs to be in the same room again. Muggsy attacked Chubbs, but I'm trying my boss' abandonment training, and it may have worked. When Muggsy attacks, I cuss and yell, storm out and drive away. I certainly scared Ross!! But Muggsy didn't attack again today and even offered Chubbs a beautiful play bow. Of course, Chubbs was too scared to play and retreated to his crate. I think that's just fine.
• My dog classes are going great. I really love all of my classes this time around. Everyone seems so eager to learn and take my advice. I'm due for a bad class soon, but I'll just enjoy this while I have it. In my boss' class, I even got through to a woman with a reactive German Shepard Dog. She couldn't get him to walk loosely on a leash and kept yelling at him. I took the leash from her and walked the dog back to the store from our field trip without him pulling. She then sheepishly asked me how I did it. That's the first time either my boss or I had gotten any kind of compliance from her. Postive methods work, people. Really!
• I got a gnarly sunburn working all weekend. I feel like crap.
• Interesting thing happened at work: Joanna's RFP isn't going that well and she said she's thinking about looking for other jobs. I wish she would so I could just stay at my job, but enough of the Board is supporting her that I don't think she'll have to resort to that. Regardless, if I get another job, I can just say that I started looking because I wasn't sure what was going to happen with her and can leave without any drama.

I guess that's all I've had going on. I'm sure I'll think of something I left out later. But it's bedtime for me now. Good-night, everyone.

The One with the TGIF!

I'm not sure which is worse, coming back to work from Christmas holiday or coming back from three days of chilling in Cali with you best friend. I think the second one. This week sucked. Major blahs-ville. I didn't want to do anything. It was either too hot or too cloudy. Last night I even slept from like 9:30 to 7:30! Ya'll know I usually go to bed at like 12:30! But finally it's Friday and I'm looking forward to a busy weekend.

Tomorrow my boss has invited us to her house on Weatherby Lake for a picnic. That should be fun as long as David doesn't jump in the lake or something! My boss has requested that all little ones where life jackets. We're ridiculously safety conscious here. And that's coming from someone ON the Safety Committee.

Sunday I thought I should go see the infamous new place my sis has moved to. Should give her a hard time about the whole moving thing then. I did buy Chandler Coldplay tix. He was excited about that. I think it's his favorite band.

I did get a head collar for the dogs. (I'm not sure if that's what it's called, but it's a collar looks like a one strap muzzle that goes around their nose.) I just got one for now to try out on each of them and see how it works. They also had the one where the stretchy things go under their legs, so I can try that out if the head collar doesn't work. I just got it last night, so I haven't been able to try it out on Maggie Muscles yet. :)

Well, it's about time for a beer folks! Have a great weekend. Don't work too hard, make sure you spend some time relaxing. Maybe you should make reading on the beach a weekly habit! :)

The One With the 26th Birthday

Well, I had a wonderful birthday weekend. My best friend, Monica, came to visit me, and even though we didn't really do much, I had a great time. It's nice to spend time with people who know you and understand you. I don't have to pretend to be someone I'm not. We went to a Dodgers game, Wedding Crashers -- really funny, you should all see it if you haven't -- and the beach, even though it was so cold we needed our jackets to sit there and read. Of course, we also ate a lot and watched several episodes of Friends.

I also got several cool gifts: dog training books that I can't wait to read from Phoebe, stickers, lotion, a dog book and two dog magazine subscriptions from Monica and two concerts, a laser light show, a book and a CD from Ross. Since Monica, who's supposed to be a chef, can't cook, she and Ross also bought me an ice cream cake. It's awesome. I'm leaving for lunch soon to go have a piece. The best part of my present from Ross is coming up next weekend when we're going to the Tom Petty concert. I can't wait!!

I also found out that my soulmate, Adam Duritz, and I also share a birthday.

The only sour note to my birthday is that my dogs still can't be around each other. Muggsy is wound up very tight, and Chubbs just doesn't seem to get it. I thought things were getting better Sunday when Chubbs would retreat to his crate every time Muggsy gave him the evil eye, but last night, he powered right at Muggsy while he was lying next to me on the bed, a recipe for disaster. I was able to retreat with Muggsy to stop any problems, but they still can't really be together. Very disappointing. This Friday is the second blood draw, so I guess we'll see what happens. I haven't really been practicing Door! like I should, but he'll do it with me fine and still freak out when you add in new people. Poor guy. Guess we'll see what happens.